I am so happy I was ale to run this giveaway with freshly picked. I’ve coveted their shoes for years! And now a blessed momma will be able to have one for her tiny pair of feet. 👏🏿👏🏿Winner: Natalie Christine 👏🏿👏🏿 […]
It’s 1:57 am on Wednesday morning and I am up “working”. My child is sitting at the bottom of my computer desk having a temper tantrum because I won’t allow her to play in my sister’s purse. But what’s really happening….. I’m freaking screaming, screeching and […]
About two years ago I met an amazing guy off of Tinder (Yes, TINDER). I didn’t know that Tinder was a smash and dash app! At that time I was seriously looking for someone to settle down with. I did my running around, and I was ready to “settle down’. Ha, I can look back on it now and laugh but I learned a very important lesson from tinder. (That’s for a whole different post). Anyways, he was the first guy I met on the app… First guy I met on the internet in general. I remember on our first date, I was so offing nervous. But he was so calm and warm that I kind of relaxed a bit. I was late for our date (as usual, don’t judge me, I’m working on it), I took the wrong train and went to the wrong 14th street lol…. But the date was so good. I talked his ear off, poor guy! I remember thinking to myself how perfect he was, he was so beautiful. “I could stare at him forever”. He was such a strong minded, soft hearted entrepreneur. I was totally enamored, because “now I’ve got you in my space, I won’t let go of you (never). He had all the qualities I wanted in a man, all except I wanted a devote Christian, a workout buddy, and a dude with tons of tattoos. Ha, my idea of my perfect man is way out there… I know lol. But now looking back on the relationships I had during that year I realize that I was just looking for someone who can stand me. Someone who didn’t mind spending their time with me because at the time my life was a MESS. I was so broken, and truth be told I’m glad nothing came out of our brief dating stage because he deserved better than who I was at that time. I’m glad I got a chance to know ME. My marriage had dissolved, and I didn’t know who I was without my ex-husband. It was a dark leeching period for me. Like a leech I stuck unto whoever was “there”, whoever showed interest… Which is lame. I found him entirely perfect. Obviously my perception of what we had is really one sided. But I appreciate the lessons I learned from him.
Letter is below…
Thank you for helping me find ME. Years later and your words are still echoing in my mind. At the time, I didn’t understand but now I GET IT. I understand why things didn’t blossom the way I wanted it to. I was on a path and so were you. You taught me that I was good enough as a model, I was good enough as a writer and I was good enough as just me. I didn’t need you to boost my ego. But it helped. You showed me your vulnerabilities and I showed you mine. For the first time someone didn’t use my vulnerability against me. I appreciate you seeing, understanding and acknowledging my value. l held you on very high esteem for a very long time, without actually knowing why. Lately I’ve been working on becoming more clear, transparent and conscious within myself. It’s been about two years since our brief encounter but I learned more from you in that time than I cared to admit at that time. I no longer have anger in my heart towards the way things ended, because I understand now. I understand why you advised me to let things go. The things from my childhood, my failed marriage, my trials and tribulations… Those things that were holding me back and keeping me from achieving my full potential. The things that created the tall impenetrable wall in my mind and life. The things that forever haunted me in my dreams at night. Beginning to let those things go changed me. It forced me to see that life is as beautiful as you make it. It made me realize that I am enough and I am strong beyond my problems. HA, I remember you telling me “Life is 80% what happens to you and 20% how you deal with it”. I hated that quote, because to me it was bullshit! I remember thinking to myself, “how the hell this dude is going to tell me about my life?” Yet, the minute I started changing my mindset the minute things became different… better. A changed mindset makes all the difference!
I admire your freedom, personality and heart. Your zeal and desire to live life happy and on your own terms inspire me. You are resilient in your goals and unwavering in who you are. You’re soft spoken and have a willingness to understand other people’s plight and that my dear, is freaking phenomenal. For you I pray that you continue to go after what it is you desire in life, and I hope that you find it. And when you do please use it to help other people reach their goals as well. Keep planting those seeds of self courage, hope, motivation and strength because who knows, maybe two years later after a coffee date and a pie face after date, this person will look back and realize that the seeds that were planted that night has grown and blossomed into a beautiful strong resilient flower. You never coached me professionally but you did personally and I am forever thankful for that. Keep being you MPM.
Yours in appreciation
I always hear people use terms like “contact me when you begin acting like the real you” or ” you’re so fake right now”… and it always leaves me thinking. Is it possible to have more than one personality that makes up the real you? […]